Your deepest desires dictate your actions.
Our desires have multiple layers. Its coverings are like that of an onion. The outer coverings are a reflection of what’s inside. There are many layers, but when you peel them off, you’re left with a small compact center.
Our desires are often a reflection of the deepest ones. And if you dig deeper, you’ll understand yourself better. It is profitable to a person if, before doing something, he asks himself first, “Why am I doing this?”
Our desires can be tricky. Most of the time we think that a certain desire is the very reason why we do things but later on discover upon introspection that the desire is actually just a result of an even more powerful desire hidden deeper in our hearts.
Let’s say you got angry at a sales clerk at the mall, shouting at her after she told you that you can’t return an item. At first, you believe that you’re emotionally stirred because its an injustice, that you need to set it right because you’re being wronged. So you scream at the clerk without so much as asking her what she’s went through that day and how low her salary is.
You walk away satisfied that justice had been done. That satisfaction is lifted up all the more by the fact that justice had been done yourself. And then days later, in a moment of calmness and reflection, you dig in deep into your heart. And then you find that the incident with the sales clerk was not about justice at all but because of a very deep desire of yours to be respected and even feared. Because once upon a time in grade school you were terribly bullied and no one interfered for you and you promised yourself along the way that it should not happen again. And that desire to protect yourself gave birth to your thirst for justice and vengeance. And at that moment with the poor sales clerk was really not about her, the mall and not even about the $10 shirt. Without you knowing it, one of your deepest undisclosed desires have taken control of you. That whole incident was in fact the 8-year old you, defending itself from the kids that bullied you decades ago. It was an unsettled part of you bursting out.
This is important I think because it will add value and nobility to our lives.
It could free us from our bondages. Upon realizing that a desire for prostitutes is rooted on a deeper desire for acceptance because the person was once upon a time rejected too many times by too many people – money and effort can be redirected to better things that soothes the same desire.
It could intensify our passion for work. On the verge of giving up, a person can recover from burn out after successfully uncovering that he has been working not just because of his desire for money but because of his desire to preserve the heritage of his parents.
It could help us with life-changing decisions. An aspiring politician can postpone his plans upon figuring out that his drive to succeed is not driven by genuine public-service but because of a deeper desire for fame, power and money. If all politicians did this, I wonder what kind of world we’re all living in right now?
In the book Emotional Intelligence 2.0, Bradberry and Greaves teaches us that looking deeper into our hearts is the key to making better decisions:
The biggest obstacle to increasing your self-awareness is the tendency to avoid the discomfort that comes from seeing yourself as you really are… Rather than avoiding a feeling, your goal should be to move toward the emotion, into it, and eventually through it…
This brings to mind what Jesus said in Matthew 12:34-35 about the source of the words we speak and the things we do:
For the mouth speaks out of the overflow of the heart. A good man produces good things from his storeroom of good, and an evil man produces evil things from his storeroom of evil.
Also, in Mark 7:15, He reminds us that we should be more careful of what’s going on inside than the food that we’re ingesting:
Nothing that goes into a person from outside can defile him, but the things that come out of a person are what defile him… For from within, out of people’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immoralities, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, evil actions, deceit, promiscuity, stinginess, blasphemy, pride and foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a person.
The widely accepted school of thinking teach that the way to discipline is the reward system. We reward what is good. We punish what is evil. This works, but most of the time it doesn’t. If it does work, it does so temporarily. Proof is the overcrowding of our prisons worldwide. There is clearly a missing factor in the way we correct ourselves.
Desires are powerful. Especially the deepest ones that hide deep in us. Those desires that have gained the ability to create multiple coverings around it. Desires that are able to tap into the power of the mind to dig itself deeper and deeper into the darkest parts of the heart.
Good news is, we’ve been equipped with the ability to harness these desires. We can either harness them and use them to propel us. Or we can allow them to subdue and control us.
The Bible offers help to those subdued by unwanted desires. And David asked from God in his writings in Psalms 51:10-12 for intervention because, just like us, he had desires that were getting out of control:
Create in me a pure heart, O God… Renew a steadfast spirit within me… Restore me… Grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
And the Lord answers in Matthew 11:28 and 2 Corinthians 5:17:
Come to me all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest… If anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!
No one comes to Jesus without being changed. Pastor John MacArthur of Grace Community Church said this:
The true mark of a genuine Christian is a changed life… his sanctification.
There is only one requirement God asks a person for Him to give the power to overcome unwanted desires. No, its not to buy a book or to deposit $100 in a televangelists’ account or to touch a TV screen like some idiot. Its simpler than that. It’s in Psalms 51:17:
The sacrifice pleasing to God is a broken spirit. God, You will not despise a broken and humbled heart.
Come to Him with pride and your academic prowess, and He will not come. All you’ll see are the inconsistencies in the BIble. Come to Him with your desire for prosperity and you will find the company of heretical fanatics. But have that broken, humbled heart the Lord requires, and He will come to you and change you into the person you were meant to be.
The best parts of your life yet are in His hands.